failed...no
Well...my last post was good.
Youth / Young Adults night last week was interesting. What a great place to apply what God has been teaching me, BUT... I fealt like I failed. Did I? No!
PLBC (Pacific Life Bible College) from Surrey came tonight to kick off thier across Canada tour. I was asked proir to the meeting that night to do announcement and I said no then I said ya, sure. It wasn't a big deal. So then I sat in the auditorium and watched the group grow bigger. As the crowd grew, my confidence shrunk or disappeared or perhaps I just became more worried about it. I didn't want to do announcements anymore. Not in front of all these people I didn't know. I don't know if I was afraid or cared about what people thought. I don't know but I didn't want to do announcements anymore.
The war begins.
Be confindent Salina. Why do I not want to do announcements? I don't know. Are you afraid of what people will think about you? Kinda but who I am in Christ is what really matters. If you get so worked up about announcements, how are you ever going to speak to big crowds like the ones you dream of? God is faithful! I am in a growth process and yes I wish it would move faster but his timing is perfect and I submit to it.
So then someone welcomes everyone to the event and she just fits in. This is her church, her school. She is being real and so confident. Is this me envying her? Probably. I compare myself to her often. I love her so much and I hate the fleshly, wordly mind. JESUS HELP ME. I pray for her, Jesus let me pray for her more, and blessings over her only. She is so wonderful and thank you for moving in and through her.
So I get up there and it is fine. I made practically no eye contact. I don't know why. I wasn't as shaky as I thought I would be. Was I moving in the anointing? Did I have to? I could just be doing duty. Is that ok?
So many thoughts through the whole night.
I wanted to leave. I wanted to dance. Thank you Lord, for letting me learn and live out what I am learning about worship. Calling, crying, and yearning for a passion to be stirred for the name of Jesus Christ in this nation. For the 11 to 14 year olds to have a burning heart for God and for the body of Christ to accept them.
Youth / Young Adults night last week was interesting. What a great place to apply what God has been teaching me, BUT... I fealt like I failed. Did I? No!
PLBC (Pacific Life Bible College) from Surrey came tonight to kick off thier across Canada tour. I was asked proir to the meeting that night to do announcement and I said no then I said ya, sure. It wasn't a big deal. So then I sat in the auditorium and watched the group grow bigger. As the crowd grew, my confidence shrunk or disappeared or perhaps I just became more worried about it. I didn't want to do announcements anymore. Not in front of all these people I didn't know. I don't know if I was afraid or cared about what people thought. I don't know but I didn't want to do announcements anymore.
The war begins.
Be confindent Salina. Why do I not want to do announcements? I don't know. Are you afraid of what people will think about you? Kinda but who I am in Christ is what really matters. If you get so worked up about announcements, how are you ever going to speak to big crowds like the ones you dream of? God is faithful! I am in a growth process and yes I wish it would move faster but his timing is perfect and I submit to it.
So then someone welcomes everyone to the event and she just fits in. This is her church, her school. She is being real and so confident. Is this me envying her? Probably. I compare myself to her often. I love her so much and I hate the fleshly, wordly mind. JESUS HELP ME. I pray for her, Jesus let me pray for her more, and blessings over her only. She is so wonderful and thank you for moving in and through her.
So I get up there and it is fine. I made practically no eye contact. I don't know why. I wasn't as shaky as I thought I would be. Was I moving in the anointing? Did I have to? I could just be doing duty. Is that ok?
So many thoughts through the whole night.
I wanted to leave. I wanted to dance. Thank you Lord, for letting me learn and live out what I am learning about worship. Calling, crying, and yearning for a passion to be stirred for the name of Jesus Christ in this nation. For the 11 to 14 year olds to have a burning heart for God and for the body of Christ to accept them.
posted by Salina | 1:18 a.m.
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